Is this how conflict in your relationship feels?

• I’m worried our conflict will always be this painful.
• Our conflict triggers memories of past conflicts.
• I feel lonely and disconnected, like we’re on different teams.
• I feel like I’m walking on eggshells around them.
• Our conflict feels like a battleground. It’s exhausting.
• We’re stuck on the same issues I fear we’ll never resolve.
• I fear we’ll never work out.
• I fear I’ll be overwhelmed and run over by their needs. Like their won’t be room for me.

I’ve seen countless couples in therapy who have expressed feeling this exact way in their relationship. We come to discover it’s because of the following –

Conflict is either volatile, or doesn’t happen at all because the couple has not been modelled healthy conflict.

Blame language is used, rather than the language of feelings and needs.

The relationship lacks friendship, emotional intimacy, romance, appreciation and/or play.

Past events are being brought up because they’re unresolved.

One or both parties are waiting until tension grows to a certain stage before confronting the other.

Parties haven’t been taught how to self-regulate emotions when triggered.

Parties lack active listening skills.

During couples counselling we work on all of these areas in-depth, making sure your relationship doesn’t fall through the gaps.